How do you get the person to change?
It’s the most common question I’m asked. And in reality, I don’t change the child at all, but I find ways to show the person what’s going on when they are facing their challenge. I use a whole toolbox of different modalities and techniques to give the person an understanding of their own feelings, actions and beliefs. We often draw incorrect conclusions about things that happen to us, and these mis-beliefs form the basis of our behaviour and emotions. You have probably tried to persuade your child yourself that some of these things aren’t true. I am sure you’ve heard “The teacher doesn’t like me.” “I’m dumb.” “Nobody likes me.” “everyone else can do it.”
I use many techniques from Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) which, simply put, enables us to change how we think, behave and feel.
What exactly is NLP?
Neuro Linguistic Programming is method of understanding how we think, what we feel and how we process our experiences. It provides techniques to interrupt and examine what’s going on internally and to enable us to intervene and make changes within.
Why is it called NLP?
Neuro: how we process out thoughts through our senses –visual, auditory, kinesthetic, smell and taste. Linguistic: the language we use to communicate with ourselves and others. Programming: the pattern of thoughts and actions we have set up to function in our daily lives. (It’s not about ‘being programmed.’)
What about children who don’t talk much?
Even though children may not be able to explain how they are feeling, their actions and behaviours give you a pretty clear picture. They often don’t know what’s caused the problem, and questions just get a one-word answer. I use techniques from art therapy and colour psychology to provide the insights on what the person is feeling.
Getting the best out of school
Sometimes it hard to know the best way to help your child and get the best for them from their school. When problems appear, children can become isolated from school, friends, schoolwork and the family. There are many good things on offer at school, but if your child (and you) feel you have become disconnected, then school can become a very negative experience for your child and the whole family.
Parents can be mystified by how their child’s school operates. Sometimes all you want is to be able to confidentially ask questions from someone neutral who knows the system.
My teaching career has encompassed many roles from Principal, SeNCO, classroom teacher Year 1-10, Literacy Leader, as well as training teachers internationally in Literacy. I have worked closely with RTLB and Educational Psychologists, and had the opportunity to study different methodologies.
In my work with individual children and their families, it’s a huge bonus to have this experience of the school system to draw on. I can help you with your child and give you different perspectives on what to expect from the school system and how to work with it, so that you and your child get the best outcomes.
- Mary was recommended to us by a friend so we booked our 6 year old daughter in for a few sessions. K had been experiencing general anxiety and seemed to be holding back in a number of facets of her life. After only the first session the positive transformation was remarkable and now it is if she has been set free to be whoever she can be. Very wonderful, positive and uplifting experience for all of us and fantastic to see our daughter so energised and motivated. I am so very glad you came into our lives.
I brought my 11 year old son to see Mary. He was very hard on himself and he didn’t know how to deal with anger and frustration and he just didn’t seem to be happy. After two sessions with Mary we noticed changes. He was happier and more confident.
Little S is nearly off to school, and she is just fantastic. I don’t think she has ever had a bad tantrum since we saw you. She still has a strong personality but she will talk and express what the problem is instead of screaming.
W was a quiet child, unsure of himself, used words like ‘shames’ and just sunk into the background. These things often went unnoticed because he was so stubborn. Two sessions with you and what a different child. He now stands proud and walks tall. He talks all the time and is happier than he has ever been.
He has had a big improvement in his story writing – much longer and more detailed and self-directed. His teacher is thrilled with his progress. He got another certificate last week for his efforts in reading and writing and his great listening etc…
Would become annoyed at teachers “I had given up on teachers, but I am not shy now. I talk heaps and I am more confident. The best thing is I can ask for help now.”
Felt he had no happy memories after his father left, and was forgetting everyday things like schoolwork and homework. “Now I can remember happy memories of times Dad and I spent together. I am much calmer and happier and I am more confident.”
Felt very pressured in the classroom. “I am much happier and more confident. I am finding it much easier to speak up. My teachers have noticed big changes.”
"Before I did the first session I was reluctant to do any school work at all and just couldn’t be bothered. It really helped, identifying the blocks I had against school work and releasing them. Since returning to school I’ve had an increase in my work rate of like 100% and all my teachers are surprised!"